tabula rasa
i am feeling pressure to make this the best first post ever. eek! i hope this isn't stupid.
i recently decided that my life needs more direction. graduating from college has added a new perspective to my life, one of utter and total panic. i mean, i graduated with a german degree and am currently living with my mother and working three part time jobs. i'm also volunteering like mad. essentially i am trying to block out the panicked voice in my head ("you have no money! you spend it all on bars and clothes! you are never going to move out of your mother's house! your hair looks terrible!") by filling all of my time with responsibilities. not a good idea, considering i am quite lazy and almost always late. to everything. damn you michigan time...i will always think i have those extra ten minutes!
i guess here's the part where i tell you WHAT i do...ok i work in an after school program at an elementary school, i am the assistant director of the drama club at a local high school, i sell popcorn and tickets and organize a children's theater series at the Michigan Theater (local non-profit movie theater), and i volunteer with PCAP (the prison creative arts project) and am directing the Vagina Monologues for the 2005 V-Day College Campaign for the University of Michigan. oh god that's a lot isn't it? nevermind, i don't want to talk about this anymore.
i recently became single again, though i don't think i am ready to use that term because it sounds so happy and frivolous and i don't really feel happy and frivolous about being single. i am in the "shit, what just happened to the last two and a half years of my life?" phase right now. hopefully soon i will progress into the "fuck, what just happened to the last ___ months of my life that i just spent wondering what happened to the past two and a half years of my life?" phase and then i'll snap the hell out of it.
what else...i love living with my mom, by the way. but not as much as i will enjoy living in my lovely apartment on third street with my lovely friend emily. we are going to burn the house down, figuratively. why are all the awesome metaphors about destruction? not that that's THAT awesome of a metaphor. i just used the word ~that~ three times in a row. *sigh*
i am banking on the hope that someday i won't be so weird.
posted by carolcatherine at 4:55 AM
1 Comments:
Awwwwwwwwwe seeix!
Funny as ever Carol, and stimulating in more than 0 ways.
If yur hair truly does look terrible . . . I started blow-drying mine 'cause it was just taking too damn long to dry on its own. Shit, nvm, wtf do I know about hair other than it sucks when its in my food.
As for the good metaphors and their chaotic nature, I think it's because "When you're happy, you wanna go out and be happy. When you're sad, that's when you find a place for your thoughts." So - people don't think up sweet metaphors for putting stuff together because when they're in the mood to build, they're fuckin building. When they're in the mood to destroy, they tear shit down and then write about it.
That's what I think anyway.
I've always wanted to see The VMs.
Peace!
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